Holla! If you are a regular reader, you may have noticed that I like to share the “not so pretty” part of my life’s journey because I believe that as much as we have so many inspiring and successful stories in the world, we also need to share the everyday struggles. After all, it is a common denominator that we all share before the success stories come and I also believe that we can view all the little and not so little pieces and phases of our everyday life and struggles with different perspectives.
Have you ever heard the phrase “life is in phases”? it took me a while to completely accept the phrase though. Today, Olowogbogboro by Nathaniel Bassey was playing and it brought back memories so I reminisced about the two years spent pursuing my Master of Science degree. I suddenly realized I missed those two years so much that I wanted to go back to school and re-live the experience. However, it will be important to let you know that this same period was the first time I would slip into depression in my life specifically in the second year. In the second year, I started wondering what I was doing studying for a Master of Science degree in Computer Science at the University of Ibadan, wondering what I was going to do with my life, how I didn’t even have a clue as to what my thesis would be like e. t. c I can remember a particular scene of me sitting alone in my room in the dark at night just crying as I wasn’t seeing any glimmer of hope.
In the first year, I was just coming out of a phase of identity loss and healing and then the academic pressure hit me . I said a lot of negative things about the institution and about the educational system and process oh! it was frustrating. Now I want to go back 🤣 “oh! the insatiable spirit of man“. Looking back now, I acknowledge that this was also when I started learning about living in the moments, cherishing them and realizing that once the moments are gone, they cannot be experienced any more. So I started learning how to accept the daily and seasonal moments, sometimes painful, sometimes sweet and sometimes just plain without anything special or memorable attached to them. I also learnt how not to only accept them but experience them as deeply as I could, enjoying the phases, process and the people it brought my way because like it is said in the Yoruba language “gbogbo ẹ̀ ń bọ̀ wá d’ìtàn” (It’s all going to become history or preferably it’s all going to become a story you would tell later on)
I can tell the story now, a positive twist to the tale would be that my thesis is still a wonder to me, I couldn’t have done that beautiful piece without the creator and the people He sent. Although I still believe that if it was written in an innovative part of the world, it would have been published and pushed for more development.
I’d just like to leave you with a question and a song recommendation, how do you want to tell the story of your present phase? As a conqueror or as a loser? Choose this day. My song recommendation for this piece would be Rhys Lewis’ Hold On To Happiness
P.S: Viva La Vida