Identity (2)?

Holla, it’s a new week and a not-so-new perspective I’d like to share.

Do you remember IDENTITY? Today I’d like to share something tugging at my heart. Identity is anchored to two things; “who you are” and “whose you are”. I would like to share some thoughts on “who you are”. I believe that this is tied strongly to our core and our soul as humans (mind, will, emotions).


Here are a few questions that can help you relate better with the term “core”: what calls closely to your soul? what defines you? what calls to your inner senses? what are you passionate about? what values matter to you that you wouldn’t trade for anything? what makes your heart beat? (😛😋😁 you get the gist), what’s your why? e. t. c.

I have a sweet and short experience to share with you before we go further on this journey.

What calls for my soul?
Image source: Giulia Bertelli on Unsplash

Have you ever observed daybreak?. For the first time, I did in my twenty-plus years on earth. It was gradual, the clouds cleared ever so slowly. I kept watching out for the entire sky to clear out but it wouldn’t 😀. I would take my attention off and check back in about 5 minutes. I would see that a part of the sky had cleared but not completely. There were still some patches of darkness. Finally, after about 30-45 minutes, the sky completely cleared out and yasssss! daylight is here.

Oh well! so it is with our journey of self-definition. Who we are, the core of our being, what defines us, and our why is not a one-day trip. It is a process that involves experiences, passion, interests, unique qualities, giftings e. t. c. This discovery takes an intentional and dedicated journey.

I still sometimes struggle with my core and the very definition of me. My identity is settled but then, I sometimes want to turn away from my core. I want to change the things that make me “Tolulope”. Changing the operating system as installed originally by the creator. Although, I now know that changing my core would also mean running away from a major part of my identity (since identity is tied to “who I am” and “whose I am”).

Recently, I had a whole day’s schedule messed up due to a struggle with my core. I was fighting to stay true to who I really was. If I can remember correctly, the last time I felt this intense struggle was in secondary (high) school and in the university too. At those times, it took a while to get over the struggle. But now, in less than 24 hours when this struggle came; I was over it. Why did it take a shorter time? Two things: Identity and Growth. Identity because as messy as my emotions were, my identity had been settled. I know whose I am and I know who I am(deep-down, I know). So, even when I try to run away from or redefine my core, the knowledge of my identity is an anchor. Growth because I recognized that some mindsets and mentalities needed to change. More importantly, I needed to learn to strike a balance. A balance between the personal mastery of my core and the passions I wanted to pursue.

Look within, it is essential
Image source: Houcine Ncib on Unsplash

So if you have your identity and the definition(s) of “who you are”settled. Be sure that the battle for your uniqueness, truth, self-definition, core, and identity would not stop. In this fast-paced and dynamic world; we are constantly at war to stay true to that which defines us and to also maintain our essence. Trust me, it is a continuous process of learning, un-learning, and re-learning. More importantly, it is a process of continually and periodically looking within. Continually and periodically yes. Sometimes, we turn off-course unknowingly. But, by periodically looking within, you can verify if you are still true to yourself. You can also retrace your steps if need be and as often as you may need to.

I understand the battle of staying true to your core. I would like to whisper to your soul to “keep fighting for what matters, and for the true definition of you“. Why? you may ask. For me, at the end of life’s journey, I want to be able to answer one question boldly with the answer NO! The question is do you have any regrets?.

I’d love to hear from you as always, what would your answer be?

P.S: Viva La Vida

Published by Tolulope Inspire

Perspectives and Inspiration

9 thoughts on “Identity (2)?

  1. Staying true to yourself is very important. Holding in to your personal values and beliefs is very important too. There will always be a struggle but you know who and whose you are. No regrets, just love and light!!!

    Thank you baby, it was thought provoking and well needed. I love you.

    Liked by 1 person

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