Holla! If you are a regular reader, you may have noticed that I like to share the “not so pretty” part of my life’s journey because I believe that as much as we have so many inspiring and successful stories in the world, we also need to share the everyday struggles because it is a common denominator that we all share before the success stories come and I also believe that we can view all the little and not so little pieces and phases of our everyday life and struggles with different perspectives .

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Image source: Joseph Gruenthal on Unsplash

Have you ever heard the phrase “life is in phases”? it took me a while to completely accept the phrase though. Today, Olowogbogboro by Nathaniel Bassey was playing and it brought back memories and so I reminisced about the two years spent pursuing my Master of Science degree. I suddenly realized I missed those two years so much I wanted to go back to school and re-live the experience. However, it will be important to let you know that this same period was the the first time I would slip into depression in my life specifically in the second year. In the second year, I started wondering what I was doing studying for a Master of Science degree in Computer science in the University of Ibadan, wondering what I was going to do with my life, how I didn’t even have a clue as to what my thesis would be like e. t. c I can remember a particular scene of me sitting alone in my room in the dark at night just crying as I wasn’t seeing any glimmer of hope.

In the first year, I was just coming out of a phase of identity loss and healing and then the academic pressure hit me . I said a lot of negative things about the institution and about the educational system and process oh! it was frustrating. Now I want to go back 🤣 “oh! the insatiable spirit of man“. Looking back now, I acknowledge that this was also when I started learning about living in the moments, cherishing them and realizing that once the moments are gone, they cannot be experienced any more. So I started learning how to accept the daily and seasonal moments, sometimes painful, sometimes sweet and sometimes just plain without anything special or memorable attached to them. I also learnt how not to only accept them but experience them as deeply as I could, enjoying the phases, process and the people it brought my way because like it is said in the Yoruba language “gbogbo ẹ̀ ń bọ̀ wá d’ìtàn” (It’s all going to become history or preferably it’s all going to become a story you would tell later on)

Image source: @tolulope_inspire

I can tell the story now, a positive twist to the tale would be that my thesis is still a wonder to me, I couldn’t have done that beautiful piece without the creator and the people He sent. Although I still believe that if it was written in an innovative part of the world, it would have been published and pushed for more development.

I’d just like to leave you with a question and a song recommendation, how do you want to tell the story of your present phase? As a conqueror or as a loser? Choose this day. My song recommendation for this piece would be Rhys Lewis’ Hold On To Happiness

P.S: Viva La Vida

Published by Tolulope Inspire

Perspectives and Inspiration

25 thoughts on “Phases…

  1. I can relate! It feels comforting to know that we all sometimes feel stuck. It’s also good to know that the good part of every phase should be appreciated and the negatives can be overcome

    Liked by 1 person

  2. So many moments we wish we can just go back in time to experience,just so we can live in the moment instead of worrying….I’m not sure I made sense…. Anyways I’ll like to tell my present story as a conqueror..😁

    Liked by 1 person

  3. We are all in this together. There are some moments we wish to re-live while we hope we don’t experience some ever again (because they are ugly). However, just has you have said, we should “always live in the moment”, I can’t agree less.
    Thanks for sharing with us👌
    P.S. I choose to tell my story as a conqueror😊✌

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is actually what i discovered about 5 years ago. I learnt my own particular life was in so many phases. Different kind of times. Some Good, some Not so good. But through it all, I won’t have it any other way. I call it my life of many phases. So in everyone of it. I make sure, i lock something down.
    Thank you Tolu. It was a beautiful read.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. For people like that get bored of being in a place after 6 months, I can agree fully that life is in phases and no two can be the same. I’ll start to remember that I’ll leave here(present phase) soon and come out as a conqueror.

    I needed this, I’m going through a very frustrating phase now but I’m going to hold onto happiness…
    Thank you for this piece lover💋💗💗

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Lope, I totally understand how you might be feeling right now, thank you for making that promise to yourself to hold on to happiness and live in this present phases knowing fully well that this too shall pass. You are always welcome and you know it love


  6. Very good piece, it reminds me of my final year in school, I kinda already gave up, I was at loss on how to go about my project coupled with the fact that I had two courses to rewrite from the previous level, it was so difficult but thank God for his love, I did graduate with my peers and now it’s history. Different challenges came but I conquered (even when I thought I would never be able to walk again).. Thanks for this piece, truly we need to learn how to live in the moment, things might be rough, might be sweet, someday we would look look back at everything we have sailed through and wonder “why did I get worried at this particular time of my life”.. Every moment cherished can never be forgotten 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello, Anonymous lol! Oh my! you thought you were not going to walk again? Wowzers, all thanks be to God that you are telling the story as a conqueror. Riiiight that wondering part is so true. No, they can never be forgotten. Thank you for sharing your perspective, it’s truthful and delightful


  7. Great stuff as always Tolu, you are indirectly speaking to me to be honest. Behind that smiling face we see there are things we struggle with everyday that you feel like not sharing with anyone.

    Liked by 1 person

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